What Type of Wine Dad Are You? A Slightly Scientific Study…
Father’s Day is just around the corner, and we’ve been doing some very important research here at Koonara (okay, research might be a bit of a stretch when it was really just some brainstorming over a few glasses of our Angel’s Peak Shiraz, but still). And before you judge our research methods, moderate wine consumption does have health benefits.
But I digress…We actually discovered/decided that wine dads fall into some pretty distinct categories. So pour yourself a glass and see which one sounds suspiciously familiar…
The “I Only Drink The Good Stuff” Dad
The Scene: This dad has a wine fridge that’s more organised than his actual office. He knows exactly which vintage of everything he owns, and he’s not afraid to tell you about the “excellent terroir expression” in his glass. He’s got a wine club membership (or three) and actually reads the tasting notes that come with his deliveries. Probably wearing a polo shirt and has strong opinions about stemware.
His Go-To: Something impressive that he can talk about for at least 20 minutes. Think our Head Honcho Cabernet – because when you’re only releasing 100 dozen of something, you know it’s serious business. He’ll definitely mention the 24 months in French oak. Twice.
Spotted: Swirling his glass with the concentration of a surgeon, making notes in a little leather-bound book that he definitely paid too much for. Has a special cupboard for “the really good bottles” that he’s saving for the perfect occasion.
Wine Dad Joke: “This wine has excellent structure… unlike my back after building that deck.”
The “Celebration Every Day” Dad
The Scene: This dad believes every sunset deserves bubbles and every Tuesday is worthy of a toast. He’s the guy who suggests opening “the good bottle” for literally any occasion – including successfully assembling IKEA furniture without swearing. Birthdays, anniversaries, the kids going to bed early – they’re all wine-worthy moments in his book.
His Go-To: Our Guardian Angel Sparkling Chardonnay, obviously. Why wait for special occasions when you can create them? Plus, he loves telling people it’s got “fine, delicate bubbles” because it makes him sound fancy.
Spotted: Popping corks with theatrical flair and making elaborate toasts about things like “surviving another grocery shopping trip with the family.” Has definitely given a speech about “life being too short for ordinary moments.”
Wine Dad Joke: “I don’t need an excuse to celebrate… but finding matching socks this morning was definitely worth a toast.”
The “Wine is Just Happy Grape Juice” Dad
The Scene: This is the dad who discovered wine relatively recently and is absolutely chuffed about it. He’s enthusiastic but not pretentious, and he genuinely just wants everyone to have a good time. He’s the type to bring three bottles to a dinner party “just in case,” and he gets genuinely excited when people give him wine as gifts (even if he’s slightly intimidated to open the really fancy ones).
His Go-To: Something approachable and delicious like our Pete Said No Pinot Noir. He loves that it’s named after real people – and he even knows a Pete (well not that One but he knows one right). he’s not intimidated by complex tasting notes. “It tastes like fruit and happiness” is his review style.
Spotted: Actually reading wine labels out loud and getting genuinely excited about trying new things. Probably has our wine club membership and a small collection of “special bottles” he’s working up the courage to open.
Wine Dad Joke: “I’m not a wine expert, but I know what I like… and I like this!”
The “Sophisticated Sipper” Dad
The Scene: This dad has been quietly building wine knowledge for years. He doesn’t show off, but somehow always brings exactly the right bottle to every occasion. He’s the guy everyone asks for wine recommendations, and he actually gives good advice.
His Go-To: Our Daisies & Dandelions Chardonnay when he wants to impress, or Angel’s Peak Shiraz for casual Friday nights. He appreciates the craftsmanship but doesn’t need to announce it to the room.
Spotted: Nodding approvingly at wine lists and somehow always knowing which wines will pair perfectly with whatever’s for dinner.
Wine Dad Joke: Dry wit that’s almost as sophisticated as his palate: “I age my wines carefully… unlike myself.”
The “Red Wine Only” Dad
The Scene: This dad has committed to red wine like he committed to his favourite footy team – completely and without question. White wine is for “other people,” and rosé is just “confused red wine.” He probably has a favourite chair and definitely has opinions about barbecue techniques.
His Go-To: Our Wanderlust Cabernet or Ezra’s Gift Shiraz. He likes wines with character and staying power, just like his 20-year-old barbecue that he refuses to replace because “they don’t make them like this anymore.”
Spotted: Grilling something substantial while holding a glass of something equally substantial. Probably wearing an apron with a wine-related pun on it.
Wine Dad Joke: “White wine? That’s just red wine that gave up too early.”
The “Only When There’s Steak” Dad
The Scene: This dad has a very specific wine relationship – it only happens when there’s proper food involved. Steak night? Wine time. Pasta dinner? Absolutely. Tuesday night leftovers? That’s what beer is for. He’s practical about his wine drinking and completely unbothered by this approach.
His Go-To: Our Wanderlust Cabernet with a good steak, or Ambriel’s Gift Cabernet when he’s feeling adventurous. He knows what works and sticks to it. No need to complicate things.
Spotted: Confidently ordering a bottle at restaurants but having absolutely nothing wine-related at home except maybe one dusty bottle from someone’s wedding.
Wine Dad Joke: “I don’t always drink wine, but when I do, there’s definitely meat involved.”
The “Young Dad Still Learning” Dad
The Scene: This dad is navigating everything for the first time – fatherhood, mortgages, and apparently wine. He’s keen to develop some sophistication but honestly just wants something that tastes good and doesn’t break the budget. He’s probably googling “what wine goes with fish fingers” more often than he’d admit.
Spotted: Taking photos of wine labels to remember what he liked, asking the bottle shop staff lots of questions, and genuinely excited when he finds something he enjoys.
His Go-To: Our Angels Wings Cab Shiraz –it’s approachable, delicious, and he loves the story behind it. Plus, it’s a blend, so he feels like he’s getting double the wine education in one bottle.
Wine Dad Joke: “I’m not sure what ‘notes of cassis’ means, but this tastes like happiness in a bottle.”
The “But I’m Actually a Beer Guy” Dad
The Scene: Plot twist! This dad wandered into wine territory accidentally (probably via marriage) and is still figuring it out. He approaches wine with the same practical attitude he has towards everything else – will it taste good with dinner? Great, let’s do this.
His Go-To: Something uncomplicated and food-friendly like our Lucy & Alice Pinot Gris. It’s refreshing like beer but fancier, and he can pronounce all the tasting notes without feeling ridiculous.
Spotted: Asking genuine questions about wine without pretension, and actually listening to the answers. Surprisingly, often becomes the most adventurous wine explorer once he gets started.
Wine Dad Joke: “I’m trading my stubby holder for a wine glass… but only on weekends.”
The Verdict
Here’s the beautiful thing about wine dads, there’s no wrong way to be one. Whether you’re swirling and sniffing with scientific precision or just enjoying a glass of something delicious after wrestling with the whipper snipper, you’re doing it right.
At Koonara, we believe wine should enhance life’s moments, not complicate them. So this Father’s Day, raise a glass to all the wine dads out there. From the ones who can tell you the exact percentage of new French oak in their glass to the ones who just know they like “the red one with the angel on it.”
So, Which Wine Dad Are You?
Our current lineup has something perfect for every dad on this list. Still not sure which category you fall into? That just means you need to do more “research” and we’re absolutely here for that.
Cheers to all the dads who understand that life’s too short for bad wine and too long not to enjoy the good stuff!
Ready to find your perfect wine match? Browse our collections or join our wine club to explore wines tailored to every type of wine dad. Because let’s be honest, you’re probably a delightful combination of at least three of these categories anyway…
